How to Act in a Porn Store: For Beginners

"Do not act like this"

“Do not act like this”


There’s nothing wrong with regular old vanilla sex. And there’s no reason why you can’t be happy never setting foot into an adult store. However, if you’re curious about widening your sexual horizons, your local porn shop is one of the best places to start. There are a lot of things that people do their first time in an adult store that tend to get the staff’s ire up. Below we have a list of tips of how to carry yourself in an adult store.

Go Sober

Too many people wait till they have had their liquid courage before they feel up to slipping into their local adult emporium. This is a MISTAKE of epic proportions. For one thing, the staff will know that you’re drunk as a skunk and immediately worry that you’re going to do something stupid. Odds are that you may. Booze makes our lips loose and the last thing you want to do is pull out a butt plug, brandish it at the girl behind the counter and then get the cops called on you.

It’s also true that if you’re going to be three sheets to the wind while you are in a porn store you are much more likely to make a strange purchase that you’re going to regret. You can’t take something home, open it, then return it to the sex shop. They will have a no returns motto all over the register, even if you’re too drunk to see it.

Treat the Staff Politely

"Talk to the staff nicely and don't irritate them"

“Talk to the staff nicely and don’t irritate them”


They work in a porn store, they are not prostitutes. Many times they are trained in how to use all of the various items in the store, however that does not mean that they, personally use all of the items in the store. They also have names, those names are not anything profane. To be perfectly honest, even if she’s got it all hanging out, that doesn’t give you the right to hit on her or call her names. She’s working, let her do her job.

It’s okay to be friendly and flirt with the hot chick at the porn store, don’t get us wrong there. But there’s a pretty big difference between telling her she’s cute and telling her that you want to bend her over the counter. Chicks are used to getting strange questions at sex stores. You’re not being clever if you ask for something kinky. If you really want to get to know her, come back in later and keep chatting her up like you would any other counter girl at any other store.

Ask Questions

This is especially true if it’s your first major trip into adult purchasing. Don’t feel bad about asking questions. We know, as dudes you want to seem like a man who knows all that there is to know about sex and about pleasing a woman. We get it. But it’s also okay to not know what that strange looking contraption called a rabbit is for. It’s also totally acceptable to look at a cock ring and be completely confused. When you come across something you don’t know about, or have a specific question ask. The people who wok at the shop are going to be trained in how to answer your questions and they may be able to steer you in the best direction for a purchase.

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